Drunk Kyo Strikes Again... Because He's An Asshole

"I can totally see where you are coming from, however I must disagree whole heartedly on moral grounds."

Remember this guy from a few weeks back? It's Drunk Kyo! Actually, that is a lie. This is Inappropriately Drunk Kyo. He's quite a bit like Drunk Kyo, except arguably more awesome. I suppose the issue with one person wielding as much awesome as this stud is that old Peter Parker catch-22 about great power being accompanied 90% of the time by great responsibility. That's not a direct quote, so calm down. Also, Peter Parker isn't real.

Once again, this bloke came around over the weekend. As per usual, he showed up just as Normal Kyo was leaving and proceeded to commit what can only be described as utter fuck-wittery non-stop for the next few hours. He didn't really leave any notes as to what happened throughout the night, but from what I understand (and what the photos suggest), the night culminated in him taking his pants off in front of a Gucci store, bathing in the glorious wit that comes with relating the terms "Gooch" and "Gucci".

Clap fucking clap, Inappropriately Drunk Kyo. You are a comedic genius. You know what doesn't garner respect or admiration from your peers? Having a reputation for busting out your junk in public. I may have covered this in that past, but IT DOESN'T HELP ANYONE for you to take your pants off. Not a single fucking person. The sad part is Normal Kyo still finds it kind of hilarious when he finally comes around at 8pm Sunday night and sees the evidence from the night before. Good work team, real winners.
I guess the positive we can take from this is that Drunk Kyo still has enough self-restraint to remain jocked up. As long as no one can actually see what’s going on in there, he still maintains a certain level of respectability (?) Right? RIGHT? Wrong.
The way I see it, it's only a matter of time before this Visual terrorist escalates shit and his Facebook is banned for inappropriate content. Come on man, no one needs to see that. No one ever in the world.

Luckily for the rest of society, Normal Kyo is a fucking genius. Two words: Button Fly. Drunk Kyo doesn't have the motor skills to undo that shit! Surely the mighty button fly will be enough to stop this madness. Only time will tell. Also, I figure the 2.5 people who actually read this thing week in week out are probably getting sick of hearing about this asshole, so I will try and keep him on lock for the next wee while so as to regail you all with far more interesting and less self-indulgent content.

Stay classy,

Kyo

P.S. The infamous photo mentioned above is available on both my Facebook and twitter... If you so desire to see my glorious pants bounty.